Here Comes the Rain Again

I’ve gone through some tough events in the last 60 days or so.

There have been two unexpected deaths, my beloved cat  T Bone has been diagnosed with a fatal disease and is declining faster than expected, my sister in law is in the hospital and to top it off, someone who I loved and trusted recently betrayed me.

I was talking to a friend about it and they said “man, when it rains it pours, huh?” 

A Big Enough Umbrella

I’ve been thinking about that statement and . . . is it really pouring?”

Why do we perceive a few drops as a torrential storm?  One event really equals one drop right? It’s not really a driving rain where we get soaked with these stressful events, is it?

What happens is that when a few things occur close enough to one another it feels like everything is going wrong all at once. The first event causes you to be stressed, vulnerable, sorrowful, anxious, worried or hurt, and now along comes another bad event and pow! Your resistance was down already and so it can seem overwhelming.  If we’re still hurting or trying to recover from the first event, the second event doesn’t help, it makes it worse. And the third event seems even worse yet. The nerve huh?

Let The Sun Shine

For someone to even utter the words “when it rains it pours” it must mean that life was pretty good prior to the series of events that threw a monkey wrench into our peace and happiness, right? It was probably business as usual with only minor annoyances like a cold, a bad report card, the car breaking down, being late to drop the kids off to soccer, a credit card payment and so on. These don’t really compare to the big bad raindrops do they? Let’s find out.

Riders on the Storm

If you’re curious as to what events have the biggest impact on your health and well being, then you’re in luck. According to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale here are the top 25 events (in order) that can rain down a whooping on you.

Death of a spouse 100
Divorce 73
Marital separation 65
Imprisonment 63
Death of a close family member 63
Personal injury or illness 53
Marriage 50
Dismissal from work 47
Marital reconciliation 45
Retirement 45
Change in health of family member 44
Pregnancy 40
Sexual difficulties 39
Gain a new family member 39
Business readjustment 39
Change in financial state 38
Death of a close friend 37
Change to different line of work 36
Change in frequency of arguments 35
Major mortgage 32
Foreclosure of mortgage or loan 30
Change in responsibilities at work 29
Child leaving home 29
Trouble with in-laws 29
Outstanding personal achievement 28

According to this list it seems I’m at total of 100. Here’s how it’s scored:

Score of 300+: At risk of illness.

Score of 150-299+: Risk of illness is moderate (reduced by 30% from the above risk).

Score 150-: Only have a slight risk of illness.

This perspective confirms that it’s not really pouring in my life, it’s actually more of a light drizzle with some heavy clouds (feelings).

Yes there are significant events that seem to knock the wind out of us, and you can’t ever be fully prepared for some of them, but that doesn’t mean it’s raining T Bone’s and dogs.

(T Bone praying for healing and peace)

Whatever you’re going through, hang in there, it will pass just as it has before. Stay encouraged whether the drops splash down on you at work or in your personal life, you can get through it.

And as Annie sang, “the sun will come out . . . tomorrow.”

Rob Liano
Rock Star Life Coach & Sales Trainer
www.rockstarsalestraining.com
1.855.832.ROCK (7625)

 © Rob Liano and Rock Star Success Coaching, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Rob Liano and Rock Star Success Coaching with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

About Rob Liano

The Rock Star Success Coach & Sales Trainer, Rob Liano is a best selling author and a Certified Life Coach empowering others through Personal Development & Professional Achievement!
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24 Responses to Here Comes the Rain Again

  1. Anne Perry says:

    Great post, Rob. That stress scale is fascinating. I think it’s interesting that marriage rates higher than death of a close friend. What? Time to simplify our weddings… sheesh!

    You have amazing perspective, and you are living proof of “what doesn’t kill us only makes us stronger.”

  2. Rasheed says:

    Glad to see that you’re hangin in there Rob!

    I actually saw that scale in a cracked article, I thought it was pretty humorous that something like that existed, but it’s probably to quantify someone’s risk of certain diseases (i know that cancer is linked to stress)

    I tried giving myself a score, but I’m at zero.

    Live life one day at a time… that’s all I ever do.

    Another great post, and inspiring to all.

  3. robliano says:

    The list is truncated and yes it’s related to probability of illness, it also asks within the last 12 months I believe so maybe you should try again lol

    Thanks!

  4. Tammy Hoffman says:

    Feeling a bit like “it’s pouring” right now, so really appreciated your blog entry. Will keep your cat in my thoughts…animals really touch that deep part of us. Regards Tammy Hoffman

  5. Sandy Skeens says:

    Excellent as always Mr. Rob. (Praying for T-bone) I have over the years learned through my relationship with Christ that “in this world we will have tribulation, but we are to be of good cheer, because Jesus said, I have overcome the world.” That is a difficult one to grab hold of but we need to so that we don’t allow all of the things that happen around us to destroy the “light” that we are to shine in those dark places. It is hard but how we walk through the “trials” brings hope to those around us and we become ministers in our weakest times. Stress is a killer and works overtime to keep us from fulfilling our destiny. You sir are ahead of the game and it is awesome to see how resilient you are even when life just happens and we don’t have control of it changing.

  6. joe casey says:

    Thanks Rob. That really helps put things in the right prespective. Hope to see you soon. Rock on!!

  7. Awesome Rob!!! Your outlook on life and words of encouragement are enlightening! Your spiritual knowledge and insight I JUST LOVE!! I’m glad I can call you FAMILY!!! Keep up the fantastic writing, i’m sending lots of love and prayers your way! Remember, God does “not” give us more then we can’t handle!! (hugs)

    Many Blessings
    Dawn ;)) OX

  8. Mindi says:

    Excellent blog, as usual. So sorry to hear about T-Bone (praying for an easy passage for him and a smooth recovery for you) and the person who betrayed you (unfortunately, it isn’t the first time, but one can hope it’s the last). Thanks for staying strong and remaining an inspiration for the rest of us.

  9. Sal Palisi says:

    Truly interesting and inspiring comments,I must say.In my mind it is a tremendous service and I can tell immediately how people have come to depend on you and that is very special.As you have stated everyone handles stress differently and I know it is impossible to measure an individuals despair.We all cry in the same way.I consider my self a strongminded person,and God knows I have needed a helping hand more than once,thats for sure.I am very happy that we have become friends and look forward to meeting you down the line.I also commend you for reaching out in such a trying time in your life,not an easy chore.My best to you, and TJ will be in my thoughts. SAL

    • robliano says:

      Wow Sal, I really appreciate the kind words, and yes this was a bit of a struggle but it helped me tremendously to come to terms with the situations and allowed me overcome the whole “sky is falling , poor me” mentality, so that in itself is a blessing, as are you.

      Thanks!

      • Sal Palisi says:

        Thanks a lot Rob,thats really nice.There have been a number of situations in my life that I have handled differently,thats for sure but I think you are right on target with not allowing the issues to just blow you away.Whatever the situation whether we handle it correctly or not,we have to try and be intelligent enough to bring change into our lives.If the change is just trying to get past a signicant loss or simply the backward way we may of mishandled some of the issues that go aliong with that,be aware of our shortcomings and improve for the next round,lol Your New Buddy!!!

  10. Rob, I’m so sorry for your losses and recent happenings. I remember taking one of these stress tests at a time when my life was in a total tailspin. My score was off the chart with job changes, moves, relationships and other happenings going on in my life.

    Sending you love and light to get through this time. xo

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